Just a quick check in. David is now an 11th grader at MBHS. He's still off his meds and is doing...okay. It's still a struggle for him to focus but he'd rather work harder to get lower grades than to get higher grades and not feel like himself. Peter and I--and his doctor--stand behind his decision, though many parents don't. We have one of the few teenagers who has lobbied to get off drugs!
We looked at a few colleges this summer and David's looking toward SUNY schools in non-urban settings because he feels calmer out of the city. He continues to be a good young man who knows what he wants and is adamant about getting it. Although we sometimes worry where he'll end up and what he ends up doing (Peter more than me), ultimately, I think he'll be okay. I have no doubt that he'll find something he loves (almost as much as video games) and will excel at it. MBHS's college readiness course is keeping him on target.
There's our yearly IEP meeting next week but it no longer instills fear. Held in David's public school instead of at the DOE with people who don't know him, it's a chance to fine-tune his education in a friendly setting surrounded by people who "get" David and want to help him succeed. His dedicated teacher, advisor Mr. Wallin, who's just amazing and so supportive, and the assistant principal/head of special ed at MBHS.
When I look at where we were when I first started writing this blog, I never thought we'd be at this point. At a good place, looking toward colleges, with a thoughtful (but a bit lazy!) high school student.
I hope this neglected blog continues to help people who need it. Don't worry, there's a light at the end of the tunnel. And it's your child.
Friday, December 4, 2015
Sunday, June 21, 2015
The Prodigal Daughter
I was shocked to discover that I haven't blogged in 18 months or so. I originally intended this blog to be an information source to help people weather the NYC education system to get their special needs child what they needed. In that way I've succeeded. But I am sadly remiss in not posting on a more regular basis.
As I write this, David is now 15 1/2 and just finishing his sophomore year at Millennium Brooklyn High School. We're lucky he made it into such a fine, caring public school. He had to write an essay, demonstrate an 85+ average and have a good attendance record. But I think it's his spirit and spark that got him there. This year, MBHS had more than 800 applicants for 125 seats. The staff is young, inventive and dedicated. They have "office hours" 3 days a week for extra help and the teachers are there (via email, in person) to give students whatever assistance they need. It's an amazing place.
Even more amazing is that David made the transition from a specialized school for kids with learning disabilities (Mary McDowell Friends School) with no more than 12 in a class to a general education setting with 30 or so in each class. But not without a lot of support and hands-on teaching. I was floored when one teacher, who is leaving to pursue her doctorate, confided that David was her favorite student in the whole school. And he basically struggled with her class. But I suppose that in his struggle to pass a difficult subject, she also saw his dedication.
Another milestone is that after years of lobbying to get off his ADHD meds, Peter and I finally relented and let him. It's been a struggle, he's still scattered and unorganized. Life for him (and us!) would be easier if he were still on his meds. But just the fact that he's willing to work harder to get lower grades tells us how miserable he was on them. He felt he wasn't himself and it was true; he was more introverted and insular. I wrote more about it here, for Ravishly, if you'd like to see more details: http://www.ravishly.com/2015/04/08/why-i-took-my-son-his-adhd-meds
Junior year will be a tough one. The SATs, college prep. But somehow, I know David will pull through all right. I don't know what he'll decided to choose as a career but I know it will be something he loves and feels passionate about. I also know he'll be great at it.
As I write this, David is now 15 1/2 and just finishing his sophomore year at Millennium Brooklyn High School. We're lucky he made it into such a fine, caring public school. He had to write an essay, demonstrate an 85+ average and have a good attendance record. But I think it's his spirit and spark that got him there. This year, MBHS had more than 800 applicants for 125 seats. The staff is young, inventive and dedicated. They have "office hours" 3 days a week for extra help and the teachers are there (via email, in person) to give students whatever assistance they need. It's an amazing place.
Even more amazing is that David made the transition from a specialized school for kids with learning disabilities (Mary McDowell Friends School) with no more than 12 in a class to a general education setting with 30 or so in each class. But not without a lot of support and hands-on teaching. I was floored when one teacher, who is leaving to pursue her doctorate, confided that David was her favorite student in the whole school. And he basically struggled with her class. But I suppose that in his struggle to pass a difficult subject, she also saw his dedication.
Another milestone is that after years of lobbying to get off his ADHD meds, Peter and I finally relented and let him. It's been a struggle, he's still scattered and unorganized. Life for him (and us!) would be easier if he were still on his meds. But just the fact that he's willing to work harder to get lower grades tells us how miserable he was on them. He felt he wasn't himself and it was true; he was more introverted and insular. I wrote more about it here, for Ravishly, if you'd like to see more details: http://www.ravishly.com/2015/04/08/why-i-took-my-son-his-adhd-meds
Junior year will be a tough one. The SATs, college prep. But somehow, I know David will pull through all right. I don't know what he'll decided to choose as a career but I know it will be something he loves and feels passionate about. I also know he'll be great at it.
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